Events and humor aplenty to complete the month of June | NevadaAppeal.com

Events and humor aplenty to complete the month of June

Carolyn Tate and Maizie Harris Jesse
For the Appeal

Almost every Tuesday evening, the Gold Hill Hotel (847-0111) sponsors a wonderful buffet and lecture. Tonight’s offering is by Lochie Paige about “The Donner Party.” The question begs to be asked, “What’s for dinner?” And, if that’s not bad enough, don’t say something you shouldn’t and “put your foot in your mouth,” nor should you “offer to lend someone a hand.” After all, you might be misunderstood and become the “butt” of other jokes. (yes, we know we’re on an elevator straight down).

•••

Now that Father Jerry Hanley is almost retired (his last day on the job is Sunday), maybe he has time to pray for us (or would that be considered another full-time job?).

•••

Luke Whalen (age 9), sent us the following joke: “If you see an American waiting outside an outhouse, what nationality is the person inside? Why he’s European, of course.” But Luke’s next-door neighbor thinks the guy outside is probably “Russian.” Hmmmm?

•••

Recommended Stories For You

The North Charleston Fire Department in South Carolina suffered a tremendous loss this week when nine firemen were killed as a furniture store roof collapsed on them. Please take a moment to thank the firefighters who protect us every day. You never know when they will be risking their lives to save you.

•••

And our sympathy goes out to the family of Las Vegas Pfc. Joshua S. Modgling, who was killed in Iraq this week. He’s another tremendous loss to the state of Nevada and our country.

•••

The Community Awards banquet is today at the Nugget. And don’t forget the Farmers Market at the Pony Express Pavilion tomorrow afternoon. Lots of good, fresh stuff to buy.

•••

Eagle Valley Golf Course will be holding three-day Junior Golf Camps each week this summer for kids between the ages of 6-11 and 12-16. Cost is $60 each, with lessons running on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. Call 887-2380 or 443-7671 for signups and details … the next Tiger Woods might be living right here in Carson City. Wild Horse Children’s Theater is having auditions for Disney’s wildly popular “High School Musical” at the Children’s Museum tonight and Wednesday at 5 p.m. Call 887-0438 for details. The curtain will rise for this fun show in November.

•••

“A group of Kentucky grade schoolers, accompanied by two female teachers, were on a field trip to Churchill Downs to see and learn about the beautiful horses. When it came time to take the children to the bathroom, one teacher went with the girls, and the other went with the boys. Unfortunately, after the boys went into the men’s room, one little boy came out and said they were too small to reach the urinal. Having no choice, the teacher went in and began hoisting the boys up one by one, all the while trying not to be too intrusive, yet trying not to get their clothes wet. As she lifted the last one, she noticed that he seemed ‘older’ than the others, so she said, ‘You must be in the fourth grade.’ ‘No, ma’am,’ he replied, ‘I’m riding Silver Arrow in the sixth today.'” (Gee, DeeAnn … we’re shocked).

•••

Mark Rogers, of Sierra Oxygen, is hoping to be in the Army this time next month, to re-up after spending some time as a civilian and now wanting to make it a career. Good luck to you and your family, Mark. May good things happen to you.

•••

Apparently, at Carson Tahoe Regional Medical Center, if a patient writes about the quality care he or she receives from an employee, that employee gets a “star.” We have found out that Thea Anderson, a nurse in the Observation Unit, is the first person to get 10 of them. Way to go, Thea … keep up the good work. Happy birthdays go out to Kirk Jesse and J. D. Patterson (we hope you get lots of presents); and a happy retirement to the “Viking” of NDOT, Scott Thorson, who retired on Friday. We’re just glad Mary still has a job and can support him.

•••

Inquiring minds asked why the outside tables were taken away at the City Cafe Bakery? Anyone? They were nice to sit at under the umbrellas in the summer. It’s kind of nice that other restaurants have some outside dining now, too.

•••

Noleen Boulter found the following: “American Indians found out what happens when you don’t have an immigration policy.” No kidding. Bill Sauer, the Gardnerville poet, says, “Summer is the season in which people try to keep the house as cool as it was in the winter when they complained about the cold.” Ain’t it the truth? And, “Life is like a roll of toilet paper … the closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.” Dagnabit.

•••

We “vented” last week because Proscenium Players, Inc., wasn’t mentioned in an “arts” article in Carson Magazine. Joe McCarthy wrote that he was “mortified” that he forgot them, particularly since he has belonged to that organization. Joe, we still love you, no matter what, and understand that it’s hard to remember “everything” all the time. Thanks for “understanding” us, too.

•••

“Somebody” sent us this one off the Internet: “Albert Einstein was at the Pearly Gates ready to enter, but St. Peter asked him for some identification. ‘Bring me a chalkboard, and I will solve some of the world’s great equations for you.’ Poof … a chalkboard appeared, and Einstein did just that. ‘In you go,’ said St. Peter. Pablo Picasso also showed up, and St. Peter wanted ID from him, too. Poof, came the board again, and Picasso proceeded to draw a picture that was unmistakably his. ‘You’re in,’ said the saint. Later, George W. Bush showed up. ‘I need ID from you,’ said St. Peter, ‘just like Einstein and Picasso.’ ‘Who are Einstein and Picasso?’ asked Bush. ‘Welcome to Heaven, George.'”

May your week be “heavenly” as well.

• Carolyn Tate and Maizie Harris Jesse are longtime Carson City residents. Write to them at editor@nevadaappeal.com.

Go back to article