Skin is in at Calendar gals signing this weekend

The Carson Calendar Girls will be signing their calendars on Saturday at the Bliss Mansion at 6 p.m. to promote their 2008 calendar to benefit Danielle Conway who is fighting so valiantly against her cancer. For $30, you can buy a calendar, get it autographed by the "girls," have a taste of wine, some fine hors d'oeuvres, and hopefully, a lot of fun. General sales begin at various local sites (which will appear in next week's column), or can be ordered at www.carsoncalendargirls.com. Ms. September and Ms. July thank you!

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We see that the powers that be will be happy to see downtown Carson Street go from four lanes to two when the freeway is done, Roop is widened and Stewart goes through. Granted, this is a "plan for the future," but we see it as ill-advised since Carson City's car population will NOT decrease, and we don't see the day that there is never a "clog" on the main street through town. Decreasing Carson Street to two lanes in the future will be akin to fitting a fat lady into a bustier. EEK!

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Terry Hoose gave us the following: "A wife asked her husband if he wanted to renew their vows. He got so excited ... he thought they'd expired." And, "Two indecisive miners were arguing over who should get what part of their latest claim. 'Do you want the gold or the silver?' the first miner finally asked. Shrugging his shoulders, his partner replied, 'Either ore.'"

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Hooray ... it's football season again. CHS will be taking on Mojave on Friday at 7:30 p.m. at home ... Go Senators! And the Virginia City Muckers will take on Carlin at Carlin for its first game in 64 years. Go Muckers! Good luck to all.

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We know why Karl Rove resigned a year early from the Bush administration ... he's going to run for president! (hey ... our rumors are as good as anyone else's) Or else "the Architect" is getting out before his "house of cards" blows down completely.

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The anguishing news from the Utah mine disaster keeps getting worse and worse. No good news has come from there in two weeks. Just keep sending your thoughts and prayers to the miners, their families, and the rescuers. They sorely need them, since the vagaries of that mine have given them no rest.

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Fred Cessna is lucky he lives in California, otherwise we'd probably be "looking" for him ... "Where can a woman over 60 find a young, sexy man who is interested in her? Try a bookstore under 'fiction.'" (pfffft) "What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause? Keep busy, and, if you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement so you will have a place to live." (right) "Why should 60-plus year olds use valet parking? Valets don't forget where they parked your car." (so we need Sudoku and crosswords ... so what) And, "As people age, do they sleep more soundly? Yes, but usually in the afternoon." Watch your back, Fred.

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The WNC Foundation held a lovely party last Thursday evening at the Jack C. Davis Observatory to thank their donors with "Dancing Under the Stars." Delicious food from Grandma Hattie's, wine, music, and dancing made the evening a lovely one. The guests also got to see and hear the space shuttle Endeavor in real time. Very interesting. Many thanks to the WNC staff for all their kindnesses.

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Craig Page says the CHS Class of 1977 will be holding its 30th reunion this weekend starting Friday at 7 p.m. at Mo & Sluggo's ... a golf tournament at Eagle Valley West at 10 a.m. on Saturday ... a dinner at the Nugget at 6:30 p.m.. Make your dinner reservations immediately by calling Loretta Pedro Evenson (690-0396) or Ann Pintar Erwin (841-0959). They are planning lots of fun things and want all members of the class to "re-yoon" with them (is that a word?). Enjoy.

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In that vein, Barbara Gregg came up with this: "I was in my new dentist's office, when I noticed his diploma. I remembered the nice and handsome young man who had been a classmate of mine 30 years ago that I had a crush on. When seeing him, though, the balding, gray-haired man with the deeply lined face was much too old to have been my classmate. After he examined me, I asked him if he had attended Carson High School. 'I did,' he said with pride. 'When did you graduate?' I asked. '1977 ... why do you ask?' 'You were in my class,' I exclaimed. He looked at me closely ... then, that ugly, bald, wrinkled, fat, decrepit old SOB asked me, 'What did you teach?'"

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Happy birthday to Jim Clift and Rod Wissert, and a belated one to Sue Cote (the ^&@ anniversary of her 25th). A good year to all.

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Lots of things happening this weekend: the Eagle Valley Golf Course is having a luau on Saturday at 5 p.m. to get some new trees at the golf course. Golf pro and manager, Jim Kepler, says there will be great entertainment and food ... $45 adults, and $25 for children. Call 246-4680 or 887-2334 for details. WNC Musical Theater is presenting a "master class" in physical theater by two-time Tony nominee, Linda Posner, on Saturday from 10-3 ... $30 ... register by calling 445-4249. If that's not enough, they are also presenting "Music of the Night," on Sept. 8 and 9 at the Sarah Winnemucca Hall, starring Maria Arrigotti, Gregory Mason and Mark Williams. Call early, since seating is limited ... 445-4249. Gorgeous music. Wild Horse Productions is hosting two workshops this Saturday ... an acting master class with New York actor, Nicolas Aliberti, and a triple-threat workshop (singing, acting and dancing) put on by professional actress, Sierra Scott. A "Kids in the Biz" workshop for parents given by Aliberti, Scott and Rosemarie DiRiviera will be Wednesday night ... call 887-0438 for costs and details on all three.

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Mike Wiklanski told us how they select CIA agents ... "Three prospective agents were being interviewed. The first, a man, was told to go into an adjoining room and kill his wife. He came out a minute later and said he couldn't possibly do it. A second man entered, was given the same instructions, and a minute later came out crying and said he couldn't do it either. The third interviewee, a woman, was told to go in and kill her husband. The interviewers were horrified to hear six shots and a big commotion. When the woman came out, they asked her what had happened. She told them, 'Some SOB put rubber bullets in the gun, so I had to kill him with the chair.'" Mercy.

• Carolyn Tate and Maizie Harris Jesse are longtime Carson City residents. They can be reached by e-mail at carolynandmaizie@yahoo.com.