Our suggestion for the next mayor

Steve Wassner, a local attorney, should be our next mayor. He's smart, up on everything, doesn't have ties to "the establishment," and is a great person. If he decides to file, we would all be lucky to have him. He's been a resident here for many years, keeps up on all the things that are going on, and has great ideas to solve some of the problems we face. We hope he runs.

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It's Tax Day (the "Ides of April") for most of us. If you haven't filed by today, you'd better get yourself an extension or "Uncle Sam" will be visiting. It's also spring ... yahoo ... the flowers and trees are blooming, the weather's warmed up, and, by this time next year, we hope there's a "do something positive" president in the White House.

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Our sympathies, and joy, go out to the Hall family of Carson City. Our sympathy on the death of their mother, Phyllis (wife of the late Reid Hall), and joy for the new opportunities facing Dr. Jon and Marsha when they move to the East Coast. Have a wonderful time! And we will miss you (especially the dental, musical and music scene here).

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A friend of C's sent us this one: "An 85-year-old couple, who watched their health, died in a plane crash. As they went into the Pearly Gates, St. Peter showed them to their new home. The man looked out of the window and saw the most beautiful golf course he'd ever seen. He asked St. P what the green fees were. 'No fees ... here you play for free every day.' They then went to the clubhouse, where a gorgeous buffet lay before them ... seafood, steaks, drinks, exotic desserts, etc. 'Don't even ask,' said St. Peter, 'this is Heaven and it's all free.' 'No low-fat foods, no low-cholesterol items, no decaffeinated tea?' asked the man. 'No,' replies St. Peter. 'That's the best part ... you can eat and drink as much as you like and you'll never get fat or sick. It's Heaven.' The old man continued, 'No gym to work out at? No testing my blood sugar, my blood pressure, or ...' 'Only if you want to,' St. Peter replied ...' All you do here is enjoy yourself.' The old man glared at his wife and said, 'You and your damned bran muffins. We could have been here years ago.'"

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Ahhhh, the San Francisco torch run ... or how do you spell F-I-A-S-C-O? Didn't the IOC plug in on "human rights," "pollution," "Tibet," "freedom of speech," etc.? Or did they just fall off the turnip truck yesterday? And George is still going to the opening ... oh, we forgot, China owns the bank.

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From the April 9 Appeal ... The Bookseller magazine published the winner of the 2007 oddest book title of the year: "If You Want Closure in Your Relationship, Start With Your Legs." Joel Rickett, deputy editor of the magazine said, "So effective is the title that you don't even need to read the book ..." No kidding.

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Good Stuff: Thanks, Mayor Marv, for always caring about Carson City; the sheep are on C-Hill again, having lunch and preventing fires; the black and white banded cattle at Lakeview Hill are having cute little calves; the WNC Wildcats have another double header on Friday (call 445-3240 for details); Ward Jesse, Kress Whalen, Pat Correnti and Champ Ferriera have birthdays this week ... cake for all; and Empire Ranch Golf Course is having their $15 green fees (includes a cart and a $5 credit for the pro shop or restaurant) April 21-29, to celebrate their birthday (885-2100), with free clinics on the 22 & 23 from 2-2:45 p.m.

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Scotty Ruff sent us this: "An 83-year-old Italian woman went to confession. She said to the priest, 'Father, during World War II, a handsome young man knocked on my door and asked me to hide him from the enemy. So I hid him in the attic.' The priest told her, 'That was a wonderful thing you did. You don't need to confess that.' 'It's worse than that, Father. He repaid me with sexual favors.' Shocked, the priest told her, 'My dear, you were both in great danger. Many people under those circumstances can be tempted to act that way. However, if you are truly sorry for your actions, you are forgiven.' 'Thank you, Father,' the old woman replied. 'That's a great load off my mind. But, I do have one more question.' 'And what is that?' asked the priest. 'Should I tell him the war is over?'"

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Ev Jesse has an idea whose time has come. Most big college football rivalries are held late in the season (i.e., Army-Navy, USC-UCLA, etc.). It helps build up interest, since a team with a poor season can upset the better team, or the better team can be even better downing an old rival. He thinks the UNR-UNLV game should be played over the Nevada Day weekend each year, to give each team the time to win some games, build up the season's expectations, and have it really "mean" something late in the season on our "birthday." He has written to many people around the state, but, so far, only the Student Body presidents of each school have replied, both with resounding affirmatives. He knows it might take a couple of years to implement the game at that time, but, again, it's an "idea whose time has come." We think it's a great one, and agree with him completely. Call the universities, coaches, governor ... anyone you can think of, and exert some pressure for this. Thanks, Ev.

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NDOT has announced that because of budget cuts, the third freeway phase through Carson won't be bid until 2012. Won't matter by then. Don't they know that according to the Mayas and Nostradamus, the world is ending that year? What a copout!

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More Good News: T-ball is back. If you've never been to a game, you deserve to treat yourself to one. The little kids are delightful ... they run to third on a base hit; they pick flowers in the field; they lie down and count bugs; you name it, they do it. And soccer is just as good. Of course, when the kids get older, they get "rules," and it becomes "serious." But, it does remind you, there are still "good old days" out there. By the way, did you know that Listerine will kill mosquitoes? Yep, just put it in a spray bottle and squirt away. Usually keeps them away for a couple of days. Don't spray on your wood door, but go for the frames, around windows, picnic tables, lawn, deck, even dab your bites. Cheaper than pesticides. Thanks to Lucy Adams for this one. (don't bother gargling ... they seldom fly down your throat).

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The Fandango Marriott is open; Bodine's is about to; and El Pollo Loco is, too, if it hasn't already (on the SOUTH side of Hwy. 50 E near where the highway does a dipsy-do). Hmmmm ... OH?

• Carolyn Tate and Maizie Harris Jesse are longtime Carson City residents. Write to them at editor@nevadaappeal.com.