The far-left socialists ... er, liberals ... er, progressives over at PLAN (Progressive Leadership Alliance of Nevada) released a "racial equity" report card this week, supposedly based on how some 18 bills in the last legislative session adversely affected minorities.
"During the 2009 Nevada Legislature, elected officials had a mixed score on addressing the most pressing issues affecting the state's more vulnerable communities, especially communities of color," the flim-flam PLAN planners dead-panned in the introduction of their "report."
Almost every conservative Republican got a failing grade. I'm ... shocked.
But to show you just how truly absurd this "report card" on "racial equity" really is, consider the fact that Senate Majority Leader Steven Horsford, the first black majority leader in Nevada's history, only scored a C-minus!
In reality, this race-baiting report card is nothing more than a knock-off of a Jeff Foxworthy comedy skit.
To give you even more of an idea of just how ridiculous this report is, consider some of the "pressing issues" PLAN included to determine whether or not an elected official was a racist (and make no mistake, that's exactly what PLAN is trying to imply with these "grades"):
If you voted against the bill establishing domestic partners in Nevada, you might be a racist.
If you voted against a bill requiring owners of off-road recreational vehicles to register them with the government and pay a hefty new "licensing" fee, you might be a racist.
If you voted against spending $70 million of taxpayer money we don't have to reopen an underpass closed because of a highway widening project that only causes a 2-minute delay to get around by taking an alternate route, you might be a racist.
If you voted against the government being able to force private employers to give parents time off from work to attend their child's school play or football game, you might be a racist.
If you voted to make English the official language of the state of Nevada, you might be a racist.
If you voted for a bill to spend money we don't have on expanded government-run pre-kindergarten daycare programs, you might be a racist.
If you voted for a bill allowing the government to control the amount of late fees a private landlord can charge tenants who fail to pay their rent on time, you might be a racist.
And finally this one, which takes the cake for chutzpah, hypocrisy and oxymoronism: If you voted against a bill making permanent the temporary position of Ombudsman of Consumer Affairs for Minorities (but not white people), you might be a racist.
It was hard enough to take PLAN seriously before it issued this asinine report card. Now it's impossible. Even for liberals.
• Chuck Muth is president of Citizen Outreach, a non-profit public policy grassroots advocacy organization. He may be reached at chuck@citizen