The first thing I would buy if I were rich would be socks |

The first thing I would buy if I were rich would be socks

Dave Frank
Appeal Staff Writer

The first thing I’ll buy if I ever get rich is lots of the same kind of sock.

I have black or white-colored socks now, and they are all slightly different kinds.

I wouldn’t care if any of my socks matched if I was never in a situation where my pants rose above the tops of my shoes, but people do see them sometimes and make you feel like you should immediately change them if they do not match.

The socks I would buy if I were rich would be gray so they would be at least somewhat acceptable at all occasions.

I think I might consider just wearing sandals if I were rich, but I would eventually stop because if I had that much money I would probably be the boss of something and sandals don’t let you assert your dominance over people who make less money than you do.

The reason I hate different kinds of socks is because my sock organization is never finished. I always have one sock sitting on the floor or on a shelf waiting for its double to be discovered.

Another reason for hating having different kinds of socks is sock sorting. I don’t like doing this because it’s so boring you have to find something else to do during the time you do it.

Other boring things like shopping for groceries or taking a shower are not close to as bad as sock sorting because they are not boring enough to force you to watch whatever is on television, no matter how bad.

Sock sorting is so terrible that you realize it would be unbearable to have to think about doing it at the same time you did.

My new socks would also have a zipper so I could take them off while I stood up.

They wouldn’t be too thin or too thick, either, because I don’t want to own something worthless or that makes my feet sweat.

I would say I would like them to never tear if I believed like everyone else did that holes in socks are worse than holes in other pieces of casual clothing. No hole is worse than a sock hole, people feel.

Someone might point out a hole in your shirt, but people only tell their friends if you have a hole in your sock because they believe it is shameful.

Socks, however, have more right than any other piece of clothing to have a hole, because they are always being stepped on and are usually only seen by your family, who probably also have sock holes.

One thing I always do try to do is at least change my socks every day, which makes me wonder why people sometimes smell their socks before they decide to change them.

The cost of washing two socks is cheap. Just assume.


Mr. Pickles Sandwich Shop, 3250 Retail Drive, is scheduled to re-open this week, say owners Sue and Jim Riordan.


First National Bank, announced the promotion of Tammy Nelson to vice president and branch relationship manager of its Carson City Branch, 1101 N. Carson St.


The Nevada Chapter AGC has named its 2008 officers and board of directors. The new officers are: Mike Cate, president (Pavers Plus); Joe Serpa, first vice president (Q&D Construction Co.); Frank Lepori, second vice president (Frank Lepori Construction); and Fred Reeder, treasurer (Reno Tahoe Construction). Its 2008 Directors are: Dave Backman (K. G. Walters Construction Co.), Bill Balsi (Valley Concrete Co., Inc.), Justin Ivory (A-1 Steel), Scott Hiatt (A& K Earthmovers), Matt Frazer (PAR Electric Contractors), Craig Holt (Sierra Nevada Construction), David Knaub (K7 Construction, Inc.), Eric Scolari (RHP Mechanical) and Kevin Weiske (Moody-Weiske Contractors), Sherri Key (Lindell’s Painting), Brien McKenzie (McKenzie Construction Inc.). For more information, visit or call Buzz Harris at the Nevada Chapter AGC office, 329-6116.


Bank of the West’s Small Business Campaign, being promoted through March 28 in Nevada, is offering small businesses – with terms subject to credit evaluation – lines of credit at prime with no loan fees, reduced rates on commercial real estate loans to small businesses, free business checking, a business rewards credit card and discounts on other business products and services.


Ken Dillon, president of D & D Roofing and Sheet Metal, has hired Daniel Woods to be the manager of the company’s office in Susanville, Calif. The Susanville office is the fourth division of D & D and will operate as Dillon Roofing.

• Contact reporter Dave Frank at or 881-1212.