Appearing now in Carson: he’s the ‘Pink Elvis’
You’ve heard of Elvis Presley, the flying Elvis and countless Elvis’ impersonators, but have you heard of Gary “The Pink Elvis” Hunt? A co-worker gave us this story … “For the last 18 months, Gary has shown up at NDOT every Wednesday dressed in a pink shirt (it goes along with his pompadour and “classic” Mustang) … then about eight months ago, he added pink shoes to his attire.
Pink pants were found on the Internet and presented to him with the challenge to go “all pink.”
“No way,” said Gary, but the gauntlet was thrown (with the sum of $100 promised if he came through). The word went out, the money flowed in, and last Wednesday, the $100 richer “Pink Elvis” was born.” We’re betting that if you need a “conversation piece” at your next party, Gary could be persuaded (at least for a free meal and a donation to charity) … “I’m all shook up … “
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For those of you who are wondering about the construction on C Hill behind the Nevada State Railroad Museum on S. Curry Street … FEMA is putting in “erosion control” (not humongous condos, like some rumors had it) … but, could we still have water going to the duck ponds? Puleez …
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Sage advice: Never take a water pill before a wedding or a funeral …
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The Department of Defense wants to close the Hawthorne Army Depot for fiscal reasons … So how come they changed the name of Indian Springs AFB yesterday (which we don’t remember hearing anything about ever) to Creech AFB, and isn’t closing it instead? Why not just use Groom Lake (Area 51), since it’s hardly a secret anymore? Or are aliens financing it, instead of the taxpayers? IMWTK …
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Anticipating a bumpy landing in Reno the other day, the Southwest stewardess said, “Stop enjoying your drinks and swallow them down … we’re going in … ” Gulp …
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The third time’s the charm … from Frazier, to Frazer, to Fraser … now do we have it right, Ken? Or should we hold out for Frayshure? (draw evil grin in here _______ ) (PS it’s Maizie’s fault)
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Sam and Moe have been friends for nigh on 90 years, but alas, Sam is dying of cancer. Moe asks him, “Sam, if there’s any way, can you contact me from the other side and let me know if they have baseball there?”
Shortly later, Sam passes on, and two days later, Moe is awakened in the middle of the night by a blinding light and a voice calling, “Moe, Moe … “
“Who is it?” asks a frightened Moe.
“It’s me, Moe, Sam … “
“It can’t be you, Sam … you’re dead.”
“It’s alright. Moe, I’m in heaven. But I have good news and bad news. The good news is they do have baseball … you can play any time, the weather is great, and we have a wonderful time.”
“What’s the bad news, Sam?”
“Moe, you’re pitching next Tuesday … “
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For those of you who have an interest in astronomy (and even those who don’t), Mars will be at its closest in over 5,000 years … some say it will rival a full moon at its brightest, and will begin the early part of August, culminating in its “close encounter” on Aug. 27 at 12:30 a.m. on that date … it’s a “must see,” because no one will ever see this happen again until the year 2287 … (are they telling us something?)
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For great music, food and drink under the stars, don’t forget the terrific Summer Concert series at Adele’s this summer … it will feature Colin Hay, Greg Brown and Dan Hicks in three separate appearances … for information and tickets, call 883-1976 (BAC), 882-3353 (Adele’s) or 882-4556 (the Crackerbox) … and then sit back and enjoy life … and thanks, Jerry, for breakfast …
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Maizie went to Yucca Mountain last week with the University of Nevada Alumni College XVI … got ID’d by the feds and taken out to the test site by a Department of Energy bus … right past the tanned camo-dressed DOE guards.
You turn on an unmarked road just past Lathrop Wells and pass many “sites” that may or may not be in use … the Mars probe site, the atomic rocket site, the place where our special forces train, old MX silos and the BREN tower that was used to duplicate the effect of the Hiroshima bomb.
The tour is free, and the DOE will pick you up at your hotel and take you to the site as long as you have reservations (1-800-225-6972). Lunch from Marie Callendar’s is $10 … worth it, since it’s an all-day trip.
M. stood on top of the mountain, went inside the 24-foot bore hole (it’s five miles long, dug by the “Yucca Mucker”), got as far as Alcove one, got tired, and went back to talk to some of the workers there. Orlando, Julie, Greg and Morgan are all convinced it is a safe place to be … even with the nuclear waste stored there.
As for the PR … the government has no Plan B (not like France and England … 97 percent of their waste is recycled). All their eggs are in Nevada’s basket, so to speak. So Maizie came away with the thought that if it does come here, we (the state of Nevada) better have Plan B … and tax the hell out of whatever comes our way. If you can take the time, it’s a trip well worth the taking …
Two additional things: If you don’t have to fly … don’t. It’s a pain to walk and wait and walk and wait. Also, M learned “how to move a desert tortoise” if you see one in the road … “pick it up carefully, not more than 1 inch off the ground, then put it in the direction it was going, so as not to disorient it.”
DOE workers take a one-hour class to learn this, then have an hour’s worth of paperwork if they meet one on the road … and you thought this administration wasn’t environmentally friendly …
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Sarah and Kurt Garrett hosted the annual Nutt House “Halloween in June” costume party on the weekend … it featured the band Factory Edge … word spread, and they got a spillover of people from the Taste of Downtown who heard the music and joined in the festivities … it was “boo”tiful …
n Carolyn DeMar and Maizie Harris Jesse are longtime Carson City residents. Write to them at email@example.com.