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Sometimes, all you can do is laugh

by Carolyn DeMarand Maizie Harris Jesse

Cancer and Alzheimer’s are diseases not to be laughed at, however, sometimes a perverted sense of humor can carry you through ….

We met a lovely lady who had undergone a double mastectomy a few years ago and was having to cope with chemotherapy, as well. She was experiencing the “hair falling out” thing and went to visit her mother, who had Alzheimer’s. Upon entering the room, her mother said, “You need a new hairdo.” The lady explained that she was suffering from the effects of chemo and that her hair was falling out, but her mother was not deterred ….” You need a new hairdo, plus your brothers never come to see me.”

Forging ahead, the lady restated her predicament, then added, “Mother, my brothers have been dead for years.” “Well, they never come to see me,” Mom repeated.

Rolling her eyes, the lady went home, disgusted that her hair was falling out in clumps, and decided she would take matters into her own hands and vacuum the falling hair off her head. As she was doing this, her husband came in and asked, “Have you been drinking?”

That afternoon, her daughter came over and shaved her remaining hair, giving her the “new hairdo” and silencing her husband. We are pleased to report that, several years later, she has a lovely head of hair and is doing ever so well. We’ll drink to that!

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One of our readers sent us an Appeal headline that stated, “Salvation Army seeking a few good turkeys,” with the statement, “Maybe they should stop by the Legislature.”

While we were chuckling over that, we spotted a story on the Internet that said, “The Supreme Court has ruled that there cannot be a nativity scene in Washington, D.C, this Christmas. This isn’t for any religious or constitutional reason. They simply haven’t been able to find three wise men and a virgin in the nation’s capital.

There isn’t a problem, however, finding enough asses to fill the stable.” Amen…

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The Medicare drug bill has been taking a few lumps this week with good reason. They say it’s “going to help the poor” … what? To become poorer? Recipients of their largess will “only” have to pay $3,600 of the first $5,100, then Medicare will pay 95 percent after that. We would like someone to introduce us to the seniors who can afford to shell out the $3,600 to get to the 95 percent level … we’re glad Senators Reid and Ensign voted against this one…

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Guy Rocha is taking heat for telling the president how “Nevada” should be pronounced. Hey, Guy, don’t let the bad guys get you down … keep the pot boiling ….

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Talk about fast action by our street department … Our favorite potholes are no longer there … The city boys done filled ’em up … and we are pleased … Way to go, guys. Thank you.

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Does anyone know where we can get those cute little phone books that were so handy to keep in your car? If you do, let us know … and we’ll pass it on ….

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Every Christmas in Carolyn’s house, her mother would go crazy trying to figure out what was in her presents. One night, Carolyn secretly watched her opening a present before she was supposed to, carefully untying and untaping a gift from her husband, then ooohing over a faux fur silver mink coat she was to receive the next day. She then carefully retaped and tied it back together and put it back under the tree.

The next morning was Christmas and when her mother opened the gift (again), Carolyn realized where she got her acting talent from, for her mother gasped and ooohed as if she’d never seen it before.

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On the other hand, Maizie’s mother would always ask her and her sister, Kress, for a list of what they wanted for Christmas, which they would always provide … requests for dollies, games, bikes, or whatever was their heart’s desire at the moment. Christmas would arrive, and there would be nothing … nothing from the lists under the tree. After several years of this (they were slow learners), they began to list things they absolutely didn’t want … that way having a chance to get what they did want.

This worked occasionally, but it was not until years later that they asked their mother why she did this … “Well, if we got you something on the list, it wouldn’t be a surprise.” And you wonder why we’re warped … By the way, no one has responded to our last week’s wish list, either ….

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Was rock art considered graffiti in the old days? Just wondering ….

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And finally, what charming member of Proscenium Players is considering running off with the Brazilian Samba Kings after performing onstage at her birthday party? We’ll pay for a tape ….

Carolyn DeMar and Maizie Harris Jesse are longtime Carson City residents. Contact them by writing to editor@nevadaappeal.com