Thoughts on ethanol, bears and the good people of Carson City | NevadaAppeal.com

Thoughts on ethanol, bears and the good people of Carson City

Maizie Harris Jesse or Carolyn Tate
For the Appeal

Ethanol sounds really good, considering we want to be less reliant on foreign oil, but it’s putting the squeeze on another part of the economy, causing prices to rise on milk (gotta feed those cows, and corn now costs more money), meat (same story), bread (more acreage is being sown with corn because it makes more money, and less is sown with wheat, so that raises the price of wheat), anything made with corn syrup (you need corn to make the syrup, and it’s going to ethanol instead), and probably many more examples we can’t think of at the moment. Why, you might ask? Because it’s the “in” thing … and, migawd, we wouldn’t want to stop paying billions in subsidies for corn now, would we? Or keep the farmers from getting rich (actually, in truth, many of them could use the money … but this way?) And corn is NOT the best way to make ethanol. Prairie grass, of all things (and several other fibrous plants), is much easier to grow, has less impact on the environment, and is MUCH more efficient than corn. So, why don’t we grow it? For one thing, we don’t subsidize it. Secondly, the corn boys don’t want to lose their subsidies. Are you getting the picture? Ethanol + corn = higher prices. So, if you want to do something about it, call your congressman or senators and put a bee (if there are any of them left … another story) in their bonnets about this (they’re in the phone book under United States Government). We want to see less dependency on foreign oil, but let’s do it with cheaper materials and NOT raise the prices of our food products.

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Vern Manke heard this old sea tale: “A pirate goes into a bar. He has a peg leg, a hook on one arm, and an eye patch. The bartender can’t take his eyes off him and asks, ‘What happened to you?’ The old pirate looks him in the eye and says, ‘I was washed overboard in a storm and a shark bit off my leg. Then I was in a horrible fight as we were taking another ship and their captain lopped off my hand with his sword.’ ‘Well, what happened to your eye,’ the bartender asked. ‘Oh, a seagull dropping fell in my eye,’ the pirate replied. ‘You lost your eye to a seagull dropping?’ ‘It was my first day with the hook.'” Aargh …

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Carolyn and Maizie disagree on the new striping at the Post Office. Carolyn thinks it sucks (the whole parking lot, for that matter), while Maizie thinks it’s better than it was. Anyone parking there must now park diagonally on the right, no matter which way you enter. Plays hell with the new self-parking Lexus, however.

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Local news, sad and glad: Our deepest condolences go out to the families of Dixie Westergard and Charles Keever. Both were an asset to Carson City and will be missed. On the positive side of things, Gerry Ruggeri had his vocal chords operated on and has had to take a “vow of silence” for three weeks (apparently, everything “came out all right”). Too bad it’s not Lent … he could have offered it up … but we’re glad he’s OK. Happy Birthdays to Betty Ruggeri and Gail Ruff (both belated), and Steve Laxalt (not belated). Just remember, they’re the “golden years.” HA!

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Hot news from Fritsch School: The new officers of Mrs. Callahan’s fifth grade class are: Alexis Lequerica, president (the Big C’s granddaughter … but, who’s proud?); Lynzee Weatherman, vice-president; Brittni Crosman, secretary; and Brent Gingell, treasurer. Congratulations all.

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M’s neighborhood near the Catholic School has been hosting a bear lately. So much so, several garbage cans have been rooted through, and one neighbor who was going out on his front porch, saw a “big, brown, furry doggggg … GOODGODIT’SABEAR!” and went streaking back into the house. This was last week, so hopefully the bear has moved on. They’ve also had quite a few deer coming down to look for food, too. It’s sure tough to be a forest dweller this year with little food to forage from. Nature’s way is not the kindest.

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A friend told us about a gay flight attendant: “He put everyone in a good mood as he joked about and served us food and drinks. As we were about to land, he sashayed down the aisle and said, ‘Captain Marvey has asked me to tell you that he’ll be landing this big, groovy plane soon, so, lovely people, if you would just put your trays and seats up, that would be super.’ As he returned up the aisle, he noticed that an Arab woman had not followed his directions. ‘Perhaps you didn’t hear me, but I need you to raise your trazypoo so this big brute plane can pitty-pat on the ground.’ She calmly turned toward the attendant and said, ‘In my country, I am a princess, and I don’t have to take orders from anyone.’ To which the flight attendant replied without missing a beat … ‘Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country I’m considered a queen, so I outrank you. Tray up, b***h!'”

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The Carson Valley Community Theatre is presenting, “Steel Magnolias,” on Oct. 19-21 and 26-28, 2007, at the CVIC Hall in Minden. For tickets and information, call Ted Nagel at 720-8316. Dinner show packages are also available. Lucille Rao directs the warm, funny and moving story.

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Dr. Rex Baggett belongs to the “Old Boy’s Book Club,” and they would sure like General John Abizaid (who apparently now lives in Carson Valley) to join them for camaraderie and a book discussion … so, if anyone knows him, let him know and contact Maizie … she will put him in touch. She thinks he will get a free meal out of it (plus the camaraderie) or maybe a drink or two. Sounds like a deal to us.

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Sheriff Kenny Furlong hosted all the volunteers who contribute so much to the Sheriff’s Office to a lovely dinner at the Silver Oak Golf Club last week. The volunteers do so many things that are valuable to our community, from patrolling the streets to search and rescue, keeping records … you name it. For every volunteer doing something, it leaves more time for the deputies to police our streets, and saves the Sheriff’s Office untold monies. They are all great folks.

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And a tale from Janet Whaley: “Last night my wife and I were sitting in the living room and I said to her, ‘I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug.’ With that, she got up, unplugged the TV, and threw out my wine.'” Drat.

• To reach Maizie Harris Jesse or Carolyn Tate, e-mail carolynandmaizie@yahoo.com.